Category Archives: mushrooms

I’ll stuff your Sausage…Mushrooms

Do you like mushrooms? If you don’t, I am judging you but I’m not too fussed. Maybe look at another recipe…Ok now that they’re gone, here’s the good stuff. These mushrooms will increase your penis size, make your breasts grow to epic proportions and super-charge your libido. You have been warned.

2 tablespoons butter
50 or so mushrooms (remove the stems)
1 pound HOT Italian sausage
1 small chopped onion
5 cloves minced garlic
1/2 cup dry bread crumbs
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
2 TBSP Dried Basil
2 TBSP Oregano
1/4 cup fresh chopped parsley

Preheat oven to 350 F (175 degrees C). Grease a baking sheet like you know you want to…real slow like…sorry I got distracted.
Melt butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Toss in the mushrooms and just like when you’re experimenting in the bedroom you want to do them for about 5 minutes a side until softened. Transfer the mushrooms to that sexy pan you greased.

batterjunkie-2Heat the skillet again over medium-high heat drop in your hot sausage, you dirty bastard. Once it’s sizzlin’ dump in the onion, garlic, and extra stem pieces and cook until the meat is brown and crumbly, about 10 minutes.

batterjunkie-5Drain excess grease and throw it out like a jilted lover. Toss the mix into a large bowl and stir in bread crumbs, 1/4 parmesan, 1/4 mozzarella, oregano, and parsley.

batterjunkie-6Now get your little love mushrooms and tenderly, gently, spoon the sausage mix into the little mushrooms cups. I like to press the spoonful up again the side of the pan really hard. This packs it. Then squish it into mushrooms.

batterjunkie-7Once they are all in the pan, dust the tops with the remaining cheese.

Bake in preheated oven until cheese is melted, about 30 minutes.batterjunkie-8Then put those hot little mushroomy balls into the closest person’s mouth.batterjunkie-9Enjoy.

Goodbye Barça Two: Marissa’s Marvelous Mushrooms

If you don’t know Marissa, you’re missing out. This girl once marched over to her friend’s house in the middle of the night to make brownies for the sole reason that said friend had threatened to make them from, A BOX! The horror. This girl knows about home cooking and today we honor her with one of the first recipes she ever taught me, Stuffed Mushrooms.

This dish is not only elegant looking for a party but is an amazingly efficient way to get a huge amount of mushrooms into your belly in the shortest time imaginable. The lovely Rana and Ines will be your mushroom models today!

20-30 large mushrooms (really as many as is humanly possible to eat)
3 Tbsp olive oil
2-3 cloves garlic to taste
1/2 onion (chopped)
3-4 sprigs of parsley (chopped)
white wine to taste
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup Bread crumbs (we use the Italian Seasoned variety)

Heat up your oven to about 200 C (about 400 F)

Grab your pile of mushroom and wash them thoroughly. If you knew how mushrooms were grown, you would be careful to wash them. (and they say the subjunctive is dead in English) Wash them well to get the nasty off.

Then one by one hold each mushroom in your hand and grab firmly around the base of the stem with your other hand. Rock the stem around until it pops out. If you’ve done it correctly there will be a nice hole recessed into the mushroom. A hole which you will soon fill with hot cheesy goodness. Whew, that whole paragraph was not very family friendly. Here on the Batter Junkie we’re no stranger to euphemisms.  Oh well, family friendly is not this blog’s demographic. Save the stems.

If you break the mushroom too irreparably with your big sausage-finger man hands, not to worry. Just throw that mushroom in with the stems. We’re going to use them in a minute. Finely chop up the stems and any mushroom causalities.

Heat the olive oil in a pan and toss in the onions and garlic. After a few minutes add the stems and white wine. Saute those naughty little flavors together for about 5 minutes and remove from heat.

In a bowl combine the mushroom mixture, cheese and bread crumbs until they form a kind of sticky gooey cheesy mess of yum. If the mixture is too dry add some olive oil. If it is sopping wet add a few more bread crumbs. Once you’ve made these a few times (oh and you will make them a few times at least) you will figure out the consistency.

Now it’s time to get rough. Take a handful of filling and stuff it into one of those unsuspecting innocent little mushrooms. Place your submissive mushrooms on a baking sheet as you fill them. Once they are all full and happy sprinkle a little olive oil over the whole tragic scene. This will help them stay moist in the oven.

Pop them in the oven for about 25-40 minutes. They will brown on top when they are done and the mushrooms will reduce in size slightly. Due to bad planning and mostly ravenous hunger, no pictures of the mushrooms “up close” were taken. They are shown here in the distance. You can imagine that they are beautiful!

I recommend baking the mushrooms right before your guests arrive. That way you can eat them all yourself saying, “What mushrooms? I didn’t see and mushrooms.” You’ll never be forced to make them against your will either because only you and I will know the secret. Shhhhh!

Thank you once again to the lovely Marissa!

Labels: appetizer, mushrooms