Category Archives: basil

I’ll stuff your Sausage…Mushrooms

Do you like mushrooms? If you don’t, I am judging you but I’m not too fussed. Maybe look at another recipe…Ok now that they’re gone, here’s the good stuff. These mushrooms will increase your penis size, make your breasts grow to epic proportions and super-charge your libido. You have been warned.

2 tablespoons butter
50 or so mushrooms (remove the stems)
1 pound HOT Italian sausage
1 small chopped onion
5 cloves minced garlic
1/2 cup dry bread crumbs
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
2 TBSP Dried Basil
2 TBSP Oregano
1/4 cup fresh chopped parsley

Preheat oven to 350 F (175 degrees C). Grease a baking sheet like you know you want to…real slow like…sorry I got distracted.
batterjunkie-1
Melt butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Toss in the mushrooms and just like when you’re experimenting in the bedroom you want to do them for about 5 minutes a side until softened. Transfer the mushrooms to that sexy pan you greased.

batterjunkie-2Heat the skillet again over medium-high heat drop in your hot sausage, you dirty bastard. Once it’s sizzlin’ dump in the onion, garlic, and extra stem pieces and cook until the meat is brown and crumbly, about 10 minutes.

batterjunkie-5Drain excess grease and throw it out like a jilted lover. Toss the mix into a large bowl and stir in bread crumbs, 1/4 parmesan, 1/4 mozzarella, oregano, and parsley.

batterjunkie-6Now get your little love mushrooms and tenderly, gently, spoon the sausage mix into the little mushrooms cups. I like to press the spoonful up again the side of the pan really hard. This packs it. Then squish it into mushrooms.

batterjunkie-7Once they are all in the pan, dust the tops with the remaining cheese.

Bake in preheated oven until cheese is melted, about 30 minutes.batterjunkie-8Then put those hot little mushroomy balls into the closest person’s mouth.batterjunkie-9Enjoy.

Katarina’s Summer Pasta Salad

A few years ago I had the good fortune to make the acquaintance of a lovely, sharp, boisterous, amazing German girl by name of Katarina. She often made this salad for barbeques and I can’t make it without thinking of her living with us that summer in Seattle. This is always a hit at parties because not only does it taste amazing, it will feed the Bundeswehr (an army).

This recipe serves: about 10 people (unless Tyler is there.)

2 bags Tortellini—cheese or pesto filling is fine.
1 pint or more cherry tomatoes or use grape tomatoes
1 cup Kalamata olives
1 red bell pepper
2 bunches green onions
1 small container feta cheese

Dressing:
1 cup low fat sour cream
4 cloves minced garlic
1 tbsp. olive oil
1 tbsp. balsamic vinegar
lemon juice from about 1/4 lemon
1 tbsp. pesto and/or fresh basil
salt & pepper

This recipe is EASY and wonderful. If you use the precooked tortellini you’re really not even trying. Come on! And you call yourself a cook?

Anyway I usually grab two -three bags of Trader Joe’s dry Tortellini and boil that up for about 10-12 minutes. Once that is done, set it aside and let it cool off. It’s too sexy for the salad right now. It needs a cold shower and Quaalude. While it is cooling prepare everything else.

Halve the tomatoes and olives, chop the red pepper and green onions all into a bowl.

In another bowl mix the sour cream, garlic, olive oil, balsamic, lemon juice, pesto/basil and salt & pepper to taste. I know this looks like you might be doing some animal husbandry but stick with it.

Now toss it all together in a large bowl. Add in the feta cheese crumbling all the way.

It will be a colorful amazing mess of yum! Anddddddd….you’re done. I told you it was easy.

Make this one for your favorite people. I know when I make it, I think of Katarina!

This one’s for you Katinka :)

Enjoy!

Home made Pizza

So you may think this is beyond you but really it’s not. Your own pizza. Amaze your friends. Amaze your small pets and animals. Amaze yourself as you triumphantly promote the gods of gluten to bow to your very whim. Let’s get started.

Ingredients:
1 tsp white sugar
1 1/2 cups warm water about 45 C (110 F)
1 tsp dry yeast
1 Tbsp olive oil
1 tsp salt
2 cups whole wheat flour
1 1/2 cups all purpose four

Topping:
Your discrection!
What I used:
Tomato basil marinara sauce
goat cheese
tomato
mozzarella
basil

Directions

In a big ass bowl, dissolve sugar in warm water. Sprinkle yeast over the top, and let the yeast orgy commence for about 10 minutes, until they’re all tuckered out and foamy.

Stir the olive oil and salt into the yeast mixture, then mix in the whole wheat flour and 1 cup of white flour into until the dough starts to gel like a really good conversation in a college bistro.

Toss that dough onto the counter but first make sure to put down some flour. Knead it like the antidote for all of the world’s problems are in there and (until all of the flour has been absorbed). Then form that puppy into a ball of awesome!

Throw it in an oiled bowl, preferably oiled by a circa 400 a.d. Egyptian oil merchant, and turn to coat the surface. Cover the bowl with a towel to prevent nasty stuff from getting in there. Let it sit an hour or so.

Once the dough has doubled in size, like a mountain becoming slowly erect, roll it out onto a floured counter again. Divide it in 2 for thin crust or use it all for thick crust (preferred by women around the globe!) Swish it into a ball again and let her rise again!

Once that has doubled again preheat the oven to 425. Squish the dough into the bottom of the pan and toss it in the oven for about 10 minutes.

Pull it out and add your toppings. (In my case: Marinara sauce, goat cheese, tomatoes, mozzarella, basil.

Bake it all for about 20 more minutes or until the cheese is golden brown and so be the crust!

Enjoy!

Our family Pesto

Pesto one of those universal foods that almost anyone can get behind, and here it is folks for your cooking enjoyment. Pesto comes from the Genoese word pestâ which literally means pounded or smushed. Long ago this dish was made by grinding together the ingredients in a mortar and pestle. Since we generally don’t have the time or patience for that, we used a blender. We’ve been making this since I was a bambino growing up in northern Italy.

Ingredients:
2 c. fresh basil leaves
1/3 c. olive oil
2 Tbsp. pine nuts
2 cloves garlic
3/4 tsp. salt

Add to:
500kg (12-16 oz.) Rotini or spiral pasta, cooked al dente, drained leaving 1-2 T. cooking liquid
1-2 T. butter
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
2 T. grated Romano pecorino cheese may be added if you’ve got it lying around. I find that if you don’t already have it, Romano adds a lot of cost to a relatively inexpensive meal, so your call cowboy.

I can’t really get my head around making the directions for this interesting. Let me put it this way, I could already be done with the directions, I’m just stalling so you keep reading.


Blend the living crap out of the first 5 ingredients. 2 cups of basil is hard to judge so I generally use about 2, 4oz boxes from Trader Joe’s.

If you’re in a part of the world without a Trader Joe’s, firstly, I’m sorry for you, but secondly I’m sure in your country, basil is not more expensive than Salmon which it is in the US.

Once the ingredients are nicely blended add them to 12oz or so of the pasta being careful to leave a little of the water in which you cooked the pasta. Add the butter and grated Parmesan and Romano if you’re a high roller! Mix it all together in the pot, and you got yourself a home-cooked meal to die for.
 Make sure to mix the pesto in with the noodles before you take it out of the pot. That way they get coated better.

(no picture available as I was too busy eating!)

Enjoy.